breaking news from mr wright...

this just in... Phil Mickelson disquised in black hornrimmed glasses, false teeth and dyed black hair playing wright handed shot 63 today but was disqualified when officials discovered he had used the name of shane bertsch to enter the wie sony open. phil said he needed the money after losing to peeheed in a million dollar matchplay event on tuesday at cathedral canyon country club. the golf world was shocked to hear of this after phil and tiger had both decided not to play in the event. in an unrelated story michelle wie was said to be near death after a suicide attempt apparently after a self endouched abortion attempt. there was no comment from the apparent boyfriend/father to be ernie els. more later on this breaking news..MW